summer scribbles

i’ve been trying to write more this summer…yet the plethora of thoughts mixed together with “__________” has prevented me from fully expressing my passions in a torrent of words. Here are a couple musings; in all likelyhood desperate for revision, but nonetheless desirous of an audience:

Demographic
By Sarah Madsen

Flyers posted on bulletin boards
used to greet me as I walked into
Fine Arts B. Colored words heralding
meetings, concerts,
apartments for lease…
The only one I remember–
I think it was printed on green;
at the bottom, in bold type–
it said: “Free vegan snacks.”

No Words
By Sarah Madsen

My mind in Greek
speaks subtilties in subconcious
bable–backwards–
off the tongue
I cannot comprehend:
Residual thoughts
taste foreign
on the back of my mouth
longing for the day when
eyes lock, and the bearing of
souls is unspoken,
understood.

warranties

quite a while ago (a while, def. :what seems like eons, but is really only a matter of months) my laptop had an altercation with the ground. while listening to my iTunes on my computer, i fell asleep, and the laptop fell, jamming the plug of the headphones into the side pannel. upon discovering the gruesom wreckage in the morning, i lamented the discovery that my speakers no longer worked.
when i called Dell tech support, i was enlightened to the fact that no, my speakers weren’t broken, but i had damaged the motherboard…oops.
despite the four-year-extended-arm-and-a-leg-givemeyourfirstchild warranty i believed i had, the unfortunate “accident” was not covered.
as of late, i have discovered that my computer is occasionally inclined to work at almost its former glory, but only after it’s been in “sleep mode” and is then “awoken”. (i am, however, becoming slightly used to the quirks exhibited by my Dell. in another lifetime perhaps it would have been an uncooperative jukebox that would require a couple kicks before it would play a song. which reminds me-i really love jukeboxes.) so, right now, i am enjoying the rare gift of iTunes use, Youtube, etc. oh how i have missed my music!

library

i wish i had the life i lived on library shelves…
the stories breathed by balladeers
the adventures begot by those with pen and prose
the dreams

’cause dreams were all they gave for free to ugly duckling girls like me [Janis Ian]

this summer i have spent congrunet hours and afternoons at the winter park public library.
browsing shelf after shelf of Hemingway, Plath, Kerouac, Dostoevsky…

cognizant of my limited literary life when i’m off at school, i deigned this summer to be one of culture.
i placed upon myself the objective to read at least a book a week, in addition to listening to countless CDs and watching numerous movies. so far, i have upheld this goal.

at the end of the summer, i will publish a full list of the items i have read, listened to or watched-it is to time-consuming to do so at the moment, so i shall post-pone it…

with each book i read this summer, i desire to drown more and more into the pages that hold my eyes captive. the boldness of the characters and myriad of themes and adventures serve only as dreams to measure myself against.

to compartmentalize my mind, my soul, right now would be impossible. In the words of Thomas DeQuincy (who wrote a very interesting book i read entitled Confessions of an English Opium Eater) “My mind is Greek…”

oh to travel like Kerouac or Hemingway, for the passiveness of a character in a Jean-Luc Godard film, to quote a line like Ingird Bergman in Casablanca or to be a philosophier with Marcus Aurelius. i long to live with the passion of any heroine in an Austen novel, to live with the hope of a fitzgerald-green light at the end of a dock, or to sing with the soul of Coultrain’s jazz!

if only…

it’s past two in the morning and my heart cannot stop from beating faster and faster and faster still. i keep time with the music, to the melody that pulses through my veins, through by being.

science says that as we age our nose, ears and toes continue to grow. i believe that the heart must grow also. for how otherwise would it have room to hold all the additional dreams i have placed inside of it?

here’s to a summer of possiblity–sleepless nights with countless dreams, canvases of limitless color, and library shelves full…